Love Without Conditions
a Reflection by Fred Schaeffer, OFS

Jesus said, "You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your being, with all your strength, and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself." (Luke 10:27) The question is how we should love our neighbor as ourselves?

Picture in your mind a person who lives alone and who, apart from attending Holy Mass on Sundays, totally keeps to him or herself. This person never talks to anyone. Are they unhappy people? No, not necessarily. They could be people who are so involved with their work or in some thought so as to take no notice of anyone around them. Quite possibly they are people who are very shy or people who are suffering so much that they want to stay private. There are also people who are totally unaffected by emotion. When we meet people like that we sometimes think "he or she doesn't seem very outgoing, so why should I be? Why should I care?"

Let's cite another example. The opposite, a lady perhaps, whose character is quite outgoing and perhaps even "bubbly"—who talks, without reservation, a flood of words to everyone she meets. She's a happy sort and treats everyone likewise. It seems quite possible that she loves her neighbors as she does herself because she exudes friendliness. I've met many people in my life. I've met very unfriendly people who treated me in a similar fashion and I've met very kind people who have become close friends.

When people are unfriendly it usually means they are experiencing a problem in their lives. So we might ask the question in reverse. "As people treat other people, is this how they treat themselves?" Do people who are unfriendly not care if others treat them in like manner? In loving God, do you expect God to give you something in return for your love? I've heard people pray "If you heal me Lord, I'll go to Holy Mass daily!" That's not love. Love doesn't pose conditions. Love is from the heart and one does not attach strings. How many people will befriend their neighbor as long as he'll let them use his riding mower on Saturdays, or some other possession which we covet but cannot afford to buy. That's not love, that's love with a qualification—that's love with "What's in it for me?"

How would you feel if your neighbor buddies up to you and after a while it becomes evident that he's more interested in using your power tools in your workshop than spending time with you? You'd feel "used." So that's not loving neighbor as "self." Maybe we, as a people, are so secular in our views that we no longer know what love or friendship is. That would be a tragedy.

If we love God it must be without any conditions. He died for us on the Cross for the remission of the sin of the world, to redeem us, and he did not attach any conditions to this deed of love. We do not love Him because it feels good. We love Him because He is love. We wish to love Him with our whole heart, whole mind and with our whole soul. We love Him by not sinning. If we love Him we must love everyone else, unconditionally without strings attached.

Fred Schaeffer, OFS 2006
#45, 2021, repub. 6/27/2023

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