Midwinter Dreams
A Reflection by Fred Schaeffer, OFS

A parish choir I sang with in 2007, sang this soulful hymn "Midwinter" by Gustav Holst. When sung the "classic" way, and in 4-part harmony, it is an awesome melody. It puts me in a certain mood. I can easily fantasize sitting in a stately English library room, with drafty high windows, sipping ever so slowly a cognac, listening to the awesome sound of “Midwinter”. I have never done that, but I can visualize it. I sat in an English library room once, in midwinter. Since I was very young, in 1946, there was no brandy, and I was very cold because the room was drafty and not well heated. It was the sitting room of an acquaintance of my mother's sister. The place belonged to a well-known London architectural historian, Dr. Nikolaus Bernard Leon Pevsner. (d. 1983) Dr. Pevsner was the 20th century’s pre-eminent scholar of art and architectural history. His Buildings of England (47-volumes) is a masterpiece in the true sense of the word and will be the definitive authority on English architecture for generations to come. People who lived in London were not noted for warm rooms in fall and winter, at least in those days.

My mother's family and possibly my Dad, had met this brilliant scholar in Dresden, Germany, of that I have no doubt, but why they met is not clear. In later years, I have looked at some of his work and I was amazed at the detail and clarity of his writing. And to think that I, when I was about 6-7 years old, would sit in his London living room in the post-war years. Heady! My mid-winter dreams.

Another Midwinter dream which is far more appealing to my contemplative nature, is that of sharing time, in prayer, with Jesus. Admittedly in Florida, where I reside, mid-winter is missing an ingredient, snow - but on second thought, that is not so terrible. I will never get used to "not having seasons," that is what I most miss from the other places I have ever lived. I have spent winters in the Netherlands, Denmark, Switzerland, Spain, England, and in various States of the USA, Massachusetts, Minnesota, New York, Indiana, Ohio, Michigan, and now, Florida. Quite a variety of places. Nonetheless, how I feel inside about God and God's Grace, and his wonderful Love for us all - that to me is not a dream, it is reality at its finest, even in the middle of a winter without snow!

Today, television seems to be heading for more reality shows. Sometimes that is like bringing the world's cesspool into the living room. But there are some great reality shows: “Escape to the Chateau” (2016-2019) is a delightful show. I wish there were more like that. What other people's reality is, is not my reality. I studiously avoid “R” rated shows. And just as many, if not most people are thinking of shelling out $440-600 plus, for a new digital large-format TV. Why is it necessary for me to see the dandruff on people's faces, when I can be spared this detail with my smaller TV? Not in my living room! It is too bad that, giving Florida's extreme weather possibilities, it is necessary for me to have Cable or Satellite TV, so that I can see the weather that is in store for us. Otherwise I could save myself the $200+ per month for a lot of trash. Yes, trash! Commercials for products I have no interest in purchasing, every 10 minutes, and movies that largely are an affront to God, and thus not suitable for me. And to the media - Give me the news straight, without telling me how you feel about it.... I will make up my own mind how to interpret it. Thank you very much! All this interrupts my Mid-winter dream! I’m not even going to mention political debates.

I know, I am counter cultural. That does not mean against culture. I am counter cultural because I love the Franciscan spiritual side of life, I love Jesus Christ, his Mother, his Father, and the Holy Spirit. They are a part of my existence, of my life. I have made Vows of Obedience and Chastity (private Vows), because as a person in religious life (1996-2002), I was not offered that opportunity (due to the status of the Order I was in). I have also made promises to that effect as a professed member of the Secular Franciscan Order. That is counter-cultural for most people. Or at least they regard it so. That has been a dream in the mid-winter of my life.

When I am finished with this little reflection, given the hour (5:20 am; I slept earlier in the night), I will snooze for and hour and then begin my day, and perhaps read about mid-winter dreams, that absent cognac (doc says no more), the stately drawing room full of books, and I will read about the Virgin Mary, who on that lonely night in an animal feeding area, because there was no room in any inn, gave birth to a lovely child whose name with Jesus. Laid in a manger, was born the King of all, the Redeemer, who gave us His Love and Mercy, because He loves us even though we are all sinners. That is my biggest mid-Winter dream, to be with Him, forever, in Paradise. The rest is unimportant.

Will Jesus recognize this earth when he returns? Will he find many who still believe in Him? I hope so!

Fred Schaeffer, OFS
December 19, 2007, rev. 2020

Note: It is said that elderly people more easily remember events in their youth: well, that’s not the case here. I still had this 2007 Reflection on my drive.

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